So Monday 31st July is the day, of the passing of my granddad and the official Goodbye ceremony wise, which is a contrast to the day out before and this will be a tough day.
The Morning:
So it was another morning, I managed to wake up at about 9:15 after a peachy fap, which to be fair the ease of pressure was needed for what was going to be faced today. I woke up and it was time to get the teeth cleaned AND CLEAN UP since it was having to make sure the suit was not stained or anything at all, like that I did not want to mess up. So I was mostly topless or with the hoodie to then get the part ready and also check on emails. But it was soon time to get the changeover and then get ready. Plus a smoothie to enjoy and gulp down for some healthy parts.
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| a cold frozen fruit smoothie |
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| The watch from Grandad |
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| The suite in the mirror selfie |
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| A cleaner look at the selfie |
So it was ending at 9:35 and we started to head to drive off to Nan's old house (Since legally the passing means that Nan owns it now) which was a wet journey and talking about small bits and the hope that Nan would take it nicely without too sadness which we can find out.
So eventually we got there about the 10 am mark at the place, my sister and her husband were there, and the stray cat decided to make an appearance. Then it was that sign of seeing the neighbours out and he was jaw dropped on how impressive and smart we all looked.
We talked about the afternoon after the sister left which included the missed parts from the aquarium to the chance and purchase of the e-bike in Evans. More talking ensures and a few phone calls later, the limousine and the horse drove up, tears were starting to drop from people's eyes and it was a beautiful sight of tribute, the silver horse with the light shade of marble.
But it was then getting into the limo and was to the backside when another car turned up which changed plan and that meant for me to sit in the front seat of the limo, but the clear view at the back of the coffin.
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| In front of the limo and looking at the herse |
The parade was solemn and that respect felt at the same time, with the bearer. But we then got to the united reform church which was always somewhere I passed but never walked into. The limo parked outside and the bearers faced to pick up and carry the coffin on the wheel to the inside of the church, there was no rush and it was time for all of us. We then walked in and took seats in the front row and the ceremony began.
The hymns were sung and then time for the first lot of speeches which was the eulogy which was a beautiful storey about my grandad and the things he had to dine including the stories that he never spoken to me about either. A speech about the scout or skip that returned home is a nice one, but again I'm not the scout or cub type of person. Then it lead to the memories from my sister and my own which ill never forget and will be quoted below which will be different than what was said due to editing and revisions that were given.
As many will hear today, Grandad was a great person, kind of heart and always very much there to help and teach many skills which some I’ve kept with me and even is reminded in my daily life more than many would think.
There have been times when he has been there to pick me up in various ways, Like playing as giant when me and sister slept over in the house in Bere alston, to when it was himself picking up both me and Emma from school to eventually just me, with walking our dog Zack (a toy poodle) along the canal path. The course of nature always finds its place from the swooping of the kingfisher to Zack walking himself back to the car. To then get home to see Nan and the sausage roll or pasty from their local premier as a treat.
Even when age progresses, the traditions stayed the same with me helping him out with his iPad and laptop, sometimes from downloading organ programs, sometimes to explore other sites, the after nan cooking a meal and watching the 1pm news, he was walking me back to the bus stop so i could get that 1:50pm bus home to then walk the dog after, back when I had days off in the week.
Even one memory of driving up with my sister to have her private medical appointment before her life on cruise ships in Dorset somewhere was still something special, even the American diner before i didn’t see my sister until years later from her journey on Cruise ships and my life came into its own from freedom after completing City College.
But the main memories will always been the caravan park at Dinham farm, which had some lovely Cornish views, all of us did outings such as Padstow crazy golf, crabbing at rock on some evenings and even the days out to Trelawny garden centre including the train on the roof and the Roast in the restaurant, to the now in administration shire adventure park. Even some mornings to get the paper at another holiday park shop, Polzeath in the evenings for some food and views too.
Most of the skills of my tech life have been guided by his keen open mind, from the callsign he used to use for amateur radio to helping me on the electronics course in Tavistock College for GCSE, Going up to the shed to listen to him play his organ or use his Compaq computer. I will always be proud of what Grandad has done for me, even as years passed and restrictions in the start of this decade and as he was there for us, we were there for him, even in the times when things were starting to deteriorate and being there he always said “Thank you for what you have done”.
Then it leads to a message from the referred, it was very and I mean very Catholic orientated. The story with Jesus and the trust in him. In a plain way of heaven being love a house with a room big enough of what your desires, happiness was a bit far fetched, but he did sort of dispel the rumour and what stereotypical heaven is like which is a fair comment. Then it was to be the chance next to hear the poem that behind the scenes, was just copied from Etsy in a way but like it was still an emotional one, buy nan it's not sunk in from the events of the past 3 weeks due to her dementia.
It then leads to another hymn to sing of amazing grace which leads to this other service of commendation and message before we start to have the last part of the soundtrack to one of Grandad's favourite films, Chitty Chitty bang bang.
Then it was the slow walk out behind the coffin, to then get back to the limo and wait for the chance to walk to the graveyard for the burial site. But instead, I had to sort out to pay an HP bill from family events to make it 300 pages limit a month in the case. But that led to a rush to go to the post office to pay £40 which was done but then I got asked where I was and once it was paid in, I walked to the limo and back to the front and then it was the parade up.
This was nice to hear some of the compliments and a fair amount of people were there, but this section next was a very private affair. We then got up to the graveyard. This was probably the saddest part of the chapter on this day which was the rain started to come in and it was actually to watch the burial and lat the final rose before the goodbye was done and in a way, it was the official chapter family passing here and there. We and the close family paid the respect and then we walked to the limo which was the final part of the funeral package. Nan lay a rose but she didnt sink on one that was a flow next to her husband.
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| The beareres and the coffin being laid to rest |
Then it was to get to the wake, which was a shorter limo journey and this was to see what comes up since the wake was the final part of this service. We parked up right outside and then walked in, but I went toilet then checked my phone, not much in messages but then it was time to walk in and see the tables were packed, not as busy as the service itself and finding out later on how some people were not arriving, but it was good to see where it starts.
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| The outside of the bowling club |
So it was bouncing around on who goes where and people were chatting in their tables and groups too. But I headed to the quiet bottom, and one of the chaps that organised the wake asked if I had the photos on the stick since Powerpoints don't work on the TV and it was a rush to get them cropped so that didnt happen. But it was then to look at some of the art books and telling my sister's hubby some of the places he painted and portraits he did, but then it was time to see the food unwrap and look at what to go for.
The food choices were limited since it was the opportunity to eat the sandwiches that had butter in all of them so I could not eat those, and the quiches had cheese in them so could not have either. It was pretty much the sausage rolls and pasties and a couple of wraps too.
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| The lunch from the wake |
But most of the afternoon was repeating things and looking around the groups, chatting to some here and there and then going outside to reflect on what happened and realising this is a chapter of my life being written, one ending and yet not another one going. Time passed on and it was time to say goodbye to Nan, which she was leaving at one, and time was feeling slower, but talking to 2 customers that were there, plu the distant cousins were talking here and there, sister's baby bump grabbed most of the talk in the groups for sure, but thats changing with induction on Wednesday.
Eventually, it was leaving towards the 2 pm mark and time to pack the things up, the books, the scout berry and cloth, plus the memories and even the donation box to TASS memory cafe, which there were alot of leftovers and the weather was starting to clear up. After speaking to more of Grandad's brother's sons with my mum, it was the final packing up and leaving, food in the car and boxes then we drove back home for more chatter and cake that was left.
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| a sombre selfie |
Then it was back to checking the internet at home and a nice walk on a kit hill in the wind, which as fucking luck goes, work customers ring me and this was going to be the rest of the day like it ended up 4 emails coming n one day so thats going to pus things for it all and the life. But then it was a nice noodle for tea since the grazing Buffet food for most of the afternoon filled me partly up.
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| The noodles and the things extras to dip them in |
But that was my weekend, with as depressing as last year and the unknown and worries last year have become realised and a common task (running home or having to wait around for lifts after work) and it is just getting used to them and losing the focus as well as in a way with what this girl on FB dating said about "I'm surprised at your age about questioning these things" when it comes to sex and relationships (NOT gender or sexual identity, that is still semi-clear). But enjoy this month and a new post and vlog will come soon from this.
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