So, its now the 3rd month and things have been quiet yet slightly more productive since our last catch up with the big day event which made me feel connected to more nice people than sometimes i forget to realise i already have in my life. But at the same time i've noticed more and more that i'm alone, even with others.
But since that event i've had casual things happen and maybe some things planned for the future. But with the skype interview finally achieved (on the 1st funnily enough), i'm hoping that something good for me will come out of it and maybe it might lead to a chance with someone, since now I feel empty and i'm not making the effort like I used to any more, whether it was buying giftcards for Emma or that time I commissioned the drawing from Kip for Charley for her US legality last year (even though 5 years ago on this date I remember that text to me that she was dating ben which is heartsnapping). But i know now that since i can't make the effort with ones i love since they are too deep in love with someone else, it makes me feel empty as fuck and maybe its also a good sign to start learning romance (hopefully with the help of gracie and for the actual sex and sex prep via a rare case of the NHS or maybe even worth BUPA a try).
Also i did mange to vlog a bit of dogwalking and mentioned some of the things i have done since the event like designed a twitch overlay for obs and also streaming "The Movies" which is coincidental since Microsoft are planning to shutdown Lionhead studios so that game might be more popular.
Watch live video from omracer6 on www.twitch.tv
Which to be honest is somewhat an achievement for me. There was also a quick life lesson with learning that being a pushover does not make you a submissive from what i found out last night and also there was a possible chance I might be dating a feedee chef whos 35 and works in some hotel in plymouth but this is no way confirmed. This is also since I tried a new Dating app called WooPlus which i've one match from a girl that joked on a feabie status about deciding whether to build a PC or date gracie, we both said hi and no conversation since.
Also i've restarted the BPD which is now 9 days in and actually its been quite a intresting one for me since there are up and down days and also patterns are too early to be found just yet (maybe in 2 weeks time i could say otherwise but i'll explain it all later on when its done).
Also since i've had these low feelings at some points i've been listening to ASMR related content which actually videos of whispering and light sounds (eating, tapping and many other things) that can help the mind relax and sometimes give a mind tingling (MIND/BRAIN) sensation and one of the recent ones i've subbed to and listen to, is HungryLips. Shes actually a very normal guy dream girl and her FB page shows that off, but i've crashed out after watching her videso and waking up the next morning to find a video still open on my iphone when waking up.
But even though this week has been quiet, of course there was mothering sunday which meant presents, I decided to get my mum some Cawston Press Apple and Elderflower (actually 12 packs of 1litre cartons which arrived quite nice and quickly, cost me £30.36 and its quite tasty but very strong with the apples.
Then it was a +7 for that day which was ok i guess but even though my sister's boyfriend drove me to the meal in my sister's car which felt ok and the meal was nice and although this tiny kid was near me, things went quite well.
But since that event i've had casual things happen and maybe some things planned for the future. But with the skype interview finally achieved (on the 1st funnily enough), i'm hoping that something good for me will come out of it and maybe it might lead to a chance with someone, since now I feel empty and i'm not making the effort like I used to any more, whether it was buying giftcards for Emma or that time I commissioned the drawing from Kip for Charley for her US legality last year (even though 5 years ago on this date I remember that text to me that she was dating ben which is heartsnapping). But i know now that since i can't make the effort with ones i love since they are too deep in love with someone else, it makes me feel empty as fuck and maybe its also a good sign to start learning romance (hopefully with the help of gracie and for the actual sex and sex prep via a rare case of the NHS or maybe even worth BUPA a try).
Also i did mange to vlog a bit of dogwalking and mentioned some of the things i have done since the event like designed a twitch overlay for obs and also streaming "The Movies" which is coincidental since Microsoft are planning to shutdown Lionhead studios so that game might be more popular.
Watch live video from omracer6 on www.twitch.tv
 |
| the twitch overlay |
Which to be honest is somewhat an achievement for me. There was also a quick life lesson with learning that being a pushover does not make you a submissive from what i found out last night and also there was a possible chance I might be dating a feedee chef whos 35 and works in some hotel in plymouth but this is no way confirmed. This is also since I tried a new Dating app called WooPlus which i've one match from a girl that joked on a feabie status about deciding whether to build a PC or date gracie, we both said hi and no conversation since.
Also i've restarted the BPD which is now 9 days in and actually its been quite a intresting one for me since there are up and down days and also patterns are too early to be found just yet (maybe in 2 weeks time i could say otherwise but i'll explain it all later on when its done).
Also since i've had these low feelings at some points i've been listening to ASMR related content which actually videos of whispering and light sounds (eating, tapping and many other things) that can help the mind relax and sometimes give a mind tingling (MIND/BRAIN) sensation and one of the recent ones i've subbed to and listen to, is HungryLips. Shes actually a very normal guy dream girl and her FB page shows that off, but i've crashed out after watching her videso and waking up the next morning to find a video still open on my iphone when waking up.
But even though this week has been quiet, of course there was mothering sunday which meant presents, I decided to get my mum some Cawston Press Apple and Elderflower (actually 12 packs of 1litre cartons which arrived quite nice and quickly, cost me £30.36 and its quite tasty but very strong with the apples.
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| The 12 pack of Apple and Elderflower Juice |
Then it was a tiring day at work the past 2 days and i might be ordering parts for a new PC, with a Skylake feel to it, Yes i'm going that route since tbh i don't use my desktop for FCP editing since its laggy as hell, so i need to use that for focus on gaming video and content. The G3900 is my weapon of choice here since its quite rare it might be a good opportunity to give intel some positive maybe-ish coverage on it. about £40 from one of my suppliers, and i might use it for a H110N.
But lets get the goals checked.
Well thats sums that off and now i have some things and family to see soon since its my nans birthday tomorrow and well its nice to catch up with her, but enjoy a picture of running back home
Also an instagram version with neat photo editing.
By for now
omracer
- Try not to fap on mornings when i have work - this has gone out the winder
- Try to have a Holiday or have a week off from work without being called up at least for one day of it - No luck with this
- Try to meet up with a girl from Feabie - This is getting closer possibly
- Plan a few days out - Too early and shitty weather to do
- Tweet More - This is getting better
- Snapchat more - This has been ideal since i've done interview screenshots, bath pics, message pics and others
- Get into my first Relationship - Could be not happening yet again :(
- Cook for a Group of Girls - No luck
- Make some music Mashups -This is going since i might be selling the DDJ-WEGO2 for £70
- Play some more Steam Games and Finish at least 2. This i will be doing once i get or if i get the new PC built if the skylake route is a good idea
Well thats sums that off and now i have some things and family to see soon since its my nans birthday tomorrow and well its nice to catch up with her, but enjoy a picture of running back home
 |
| Running back home |
By for now
omracer